Come in, We're Open! Air Conditioning!

Come in, We’re Open! Air Conditioning!

* Chili with onions and garlic and onions and chile and a 4 year old boy I found in the street and returned to his father I found sleeping in the garage doorway with the TV blasting even though I was banging on the front door. 85 cents.

* Hot dog with mustard and onions and chile con carne and the police returning to that house a couple times. 75 cents.

* Chicken soup/ sopa de pollo with Saltine crackers with the coyote that looked in bad shape crossing the hill then someone said they saw it was dead. 85 cents.

* Ostrich burger deluxe with tomato and lettuce add extras like avocado bacon American cheese chili two patties dill pickle and Arturo and Dianna said the new coyote pups live in the trees and brush on the slope behind their house and the fire engines set them howling. 99 cents.

* Devil’s food cake with German chocolate icing with all the raccoons gone after Igor the big mean dog killed the last one and Igor has been gone for years then Sheldon and Elizabeth got a new bull terrier puppy but it died recently after eating plastic. 75 cents.

* Stella Artois Belgian Lager beer in an ice cold bottle with the little boy’s mom sitting in the black Toyota 4-Runner (that the vato had been working on by our house) in front of the 99 Cents Store putting on make-up in the front seat. 50 cents.

* Fresh perch pan fried in butter with a slice of lemon and parsley and a choice of a side of corn on the cob or mixed carrots and peas or the mom standing over the dude in the yard screeching and shrieking that he was worthless and useless and a thief and why didn’t he take care of his own child but he didn’t say anything and later it sounded like she was throwing things in the house. One dollar 15 cents.

* Cucumber salad with mozzarella perfect for these hot days at the house across the street from the little boy that family used to have screaming fights between the parents and the teens but it’s been quiet for more than a year and I saw the boy (who looks like a man now) helping his dad repair the car and the teen girl walking happily with a girlfriend. 45 cents.

* Tomato salad with capers and red onions another summer favorite! The girl used to eject herself in fury after a screaming fit from her house (where they moved in after an old lady, a relative died) hurling abuse and cussing as she went shrieking down the street and one evening after work I drove up the street and found her wailing and sitting in the middle of the street and she didn’t move instead crying out her complaints and accusations against somebody about something. 45 cents.

* Steak sandwich on a sourdough roll with tomato pickle and lettuce great with our special hot mustard just ask for some! The whole family who lives next to the district attorney with his Japanese American wife and their dogs seems happier and the teen girl walked by laughing with her friend. Our dollar plate.

* Cottage cheese with sliced peaches perfect for weather like this! Joan said a woman warned her that her brother was being released from prison after serving a sentence as a sex offender for abusing kids (she said she wouldn’t let him near her own children) and was coming to live with their elderly mother and she asked us if we could think of any way to prevent him from moving in next to her and her kids and now Joan has her house up for sale. 35 cents.

* Fresh brewed ice tea ice cold with endless refills. The Chinese woman rumored to be a physician is so rarely around her white house that we only see her once every couple years and her plants are drying out. 10 cents.

* Minnestrone soup with barley and your choice of white wheat or sourdough toast once I opened a package delivered to my house by mistake and it was a book on Beat literature I had not ordered and I returned it to a guy up the street but I never saw him again and that house went up for sale too. 75 cents.

* Apple pie a la mode with your choice of vanilla, strawberry, chocolate or Neopolitan ice cream on top we like the flocks of parrots the South American conyers (Sheldon called them) with their red throats and green heads who fly in raccous parties across the San Gabriel Valley and when it has berries they fly in a great screechy bustling crowd into the bush above Carlos’s house and eat berries hanging loudly from the branches by their feet sideways or upside down looking at you in the eye with the one eye on each side of their head. 65 cents.