1. i stopped doing karate & martial arts in part to try to think more pacifistically & try to be more empathetic & “broad-minded.” fidgeted about being more liberal.
2. tried to be less literal, more figurative in thinking. ultraviolet rays & seedpods.
3. tried to be kinder, more sympathy, less dismissive. to some degree probably succeeded, hence sending rent checks, etc.
4. less frenetic activity, more measured reflection. tried to see elusive shadow penumbra of self that refuses to be seen.
5. tried to live a new life within margins & husks of the old life—failed.

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