the sudden pain, momentary big jolt through my foot and my ankle suddenly made me wince: happily going up the steps to the target store parking lot—something to do with steel and the screws in that ankle that i got in 2006, like hiking down into the grand canyon and back to the south rim from the colorado river last april: i love how i could feel everything—it was stainless steel attached to the bone by armenian american surgeon probably immigrant son, survivor of a persecuted people, who flayed the shattered joint from a hike in north cascades national park, he reconstructed it at verdugo hills hospital (i’ve never been there before or since), sometimes i get unknown sensations shooting through those nerves, striding happily through them; i love how this body and its happiness is reconstructed, industrial and alive, this happiness feels and works and moves between parked cars and vehicles searching for parking, shoppers strolling through the terrific afternoon in the san gabriel valley—i have left behind my own vehicle where french money from a translation of a novel will pay for new tires, crossed the bustling parking lot, strolling out on main street: thinking my happiness itself is made of stainless steel and industrial—it is manufactured from a bar of steel and steel screws drilled into living bone, bloody happiness inside ligament, tissue and skin, happiness of cars and streets, of the dusty display of lighting fixtures in the electrical parts plateglass storefront, of the corroded metal door the worker slides down closing for the day, of the vehicles dismantled in the open bays of the brake repair garage, of the quiet grounds of the convalescent facility next to the jehovah witness church, i crossed elm street where diana once lived (the young mother killed in an SUV roll-over in texas), crossing fremont by yum yum donuts by the former popeye’s chicken that is vacant and empty, (another business killed by the ruined economy), the pain totally gone from my foot and ankle, my happiness steel manufactured in the industrial afternoon.

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